Leif - Nurnberg, Germany - October 1979 - Age: Almost 5

I love this photo of Leif. He looks so precious, and sweet, with a little, soft smile. In photos like this, you can see the vulnerability come through. I don't think he ever lost that. He just learned to cover it up and look macho.

He always loved posing in or by trees. I think this one was taken at the Nurnberg Zoo. We had a great afternoon there with our friends the Summerlins. Leif loved playing with Erin. The two of them always got along, unlike he and some of his male friends, with whom he sometimes got into spats.

There is a wonderful innocence about Leif's photos under the age of about 14. At some point, be began to have less trust in the world and eventually became cynical. I wish life had not done that to him, that he had been able to stay this open, this hopeful, this accepting of life.

I'll never see that look on his face again, though I did see expressions of delight and happiness, particularly when he was with his nieces and nephew, children with whom he could horse around and have fun without having his guard up.

All our children grow up, and we only have our photos and memories of those earlier days, but ours are all the more precious because we will never see Leif again.